"Reading 10-Qs is fun!" — Said no one, ever.

Ok but actually, for us investors, reading 10Ks and 10Qs is actually pretty fun. Especially the risks section.

For those of you who think the risks section is boring, here is an urban dictionary translation of the risks associated with the EV maker Canoo $GOEV.

😬 We need funding. We are freaking out that we won't be able to raise more money.

😬 We have so little control over our own destiny. Things like interest rates, inflation, and heck, the war in Ukraine could blow us up, yet there's zilch we can do about those things. Live, laugh, love.

😤 Gosh darn Tesla is dropping their gosh darn prices, which will make it harder for us to sell our gosh darn cars.

🫤 We set some timelines to make our electric vehicles. We have no idea if we can actually finish in time.

🫠 Spending is fun. We might be bad at controlling the costs associated with our operations. Tee hee.

🏗️ Ideally, we will build a manufacturing facility some day. That is hard. We will try our best. Wish us luck!

🏗️ That manufacturing facility we were just talking about, yeah, even if we successfully build it, it could cost so much, or take so much time, we might fail anyway. Just thought we'd spell that one out for ya'

😎 A good track record is important. We don't have one. We're "early stage," which means we incur significant expenses and 100% have every reason to believe will will continue to bleed money for the foreseeable future.

🫡 There are some super nice people who said they would buy our cars. So we told Wall Street, and now Wall Street values us off of those expectations. But sometimes nice people do mean things. Like buy fewer of our cars than they said they would. Or none at all. Beware nice people.

🔨 Oklahoma and Arkansas offered us incentives to develop our own manufacturing facilities. We thought those incentives were all ours. But now... maybe?

🥺 We know how much money we need. This is a problem because we also know that we have not achieved positive operating cash flow. And the weight of this knowledge haunts us. But it helps to share. Thanks for listening.

😵‍💫 Volatility in costs as well as demand for our cars is hard to deal with. This might un-alive us.

🫣 Our "control" over our financial reporting was weak (in the past). It's not anymore. But like, if we somehow realized that it got weak again, that would be bad for you. You probably are wondering what this means exactly. No follow up questions.

🌈 We might grow extremely quickly. You probably think that's a good thing. But growth is stressful. And very busy. If we are not able to take the requisite amount of naps to deal with all of this hypothetical growth, we will become very sleepy.

😎 We've got a great team, according to us. But if other people think we smell weird, we may not be able to attract other great team members. Their loss. But maybe ours too... if we do, in fact, stink.

😜 We have absolutely no experience in manufacturing a ton of electric vehicles. Which, is what we are trying to do.

🤓 We have an EV model we think is cool, but if other people don't think it's cool, we don't have any other models. So this one better work.

🤫 There is this thing called the "Canoo Digital Ecosystem"— it's a software platform that's super important to how we plan to get revenue. We hope we can build it. Can we build it? We hope we can build it.

😭 We might fail to attract new customers, or enough customers, or retain customers, or customers at all. We are seeing a therapist about our anxiety.

Disclosure: I am currently long Canoo 🙃 🥸 🤡 😭

“Everyone must believe in something. I believe I’ll go canoeing.” — Henry David Thoreau